We are all accustomed to viewing the needs of others as reflections of our own. we assume, with kind intentions, that what pleases us is also satisfying to those we love. Yet, due to our individual differences, our loved ones may not enjoy everything we may find pleasing. Learning to tailor our actions to please our beloved is a goal, skill and worthwhile life task.

To be a truly loving partner, develop a pleasing curiosity about how best to enrich your mate’s life in his/her preferred way. Doing it your way may be well-intentioned but misguided.

Most pairs learn a great deal about each other’s preferences when they date and assume that these wishes stay constant. this incorrect premise leads to great misunderstandings. Keeping pace with your mate’s needs and wants through gentle inquiry is essential to couple happiness.

In his book, “The Five Love Languages,” Dr. Gary Chapman delineates five types of behaviors that resonate with people’s sense of being loved. One can seek: quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service or physical touch as his/her most pleasing love expression. “If you express love in a way your spouse doesn’t understand, he or she won’t realize you’ve expressed your love at all. perhaps your husband needs to hear encouraging words, but you feel cooking a nice dinner will cheer him up. Or, maybe your wife craves time with you — time away from the kids and television. The flowers you gave her just don’t communicate that you care.”

In addition to our love languages hierarchy, we crave different activities at different times to satisfy our current needs. The adventurous trip of last year may need to be replaced this year by a relaxing resort stay to please your overworked and stressed mate.

Asking your partner about his/her thoughts, feelings, needs and wants on a day to day basis helps couples stay close and connected. The inquiry needs to be stated neutrally without emotional approval or dismay.

In “Passionate Marriage,” Dr. David Schnarch defines the concept of intimacy as a blend of “individuality” and “togetherness.”

“Individuality propels us to follow our own directives, to be on our own, to create a unique identity,” Schnarch writes. “Togetherness pushes us to follow the directives of others, to be a part of the group. when individuality and togetherness are expressed in balanced, healthy ways, the result is a meaningful relationship that doesn’t deteriorate into emotional fusion.”

To be in a loving union, be clear about the needs, wants and desires of your beloved and stretch to meet them to the best of your ability without losing yourself in the process.

Contact Offra Gerstein, a clinical psychologist in Santa Cruz with more than 30 years of success in helping individuals and couples restore their love. call 476-7666 or visit RelationshipMatters.com.

at a glance

Love yourpartner well:

always ask — do not assume what your spouse needs or wants at any moment.

Oblige graciously as long as you are not submitting or accumulating resentments.

Negotiate a compromise, if needed to please both of you.

Love your partner in his/her way. it fosters mutuality, tenderness and true intimacy.

Offra Gerstein, Relationship Matters: Love your partner in his/her way

Offra Gerstein, Relationship Matters: Love your partner in his/her way is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

Published on Friday 4 may 2012 09:00

ART CLUB Exhibition and Sale. the annual exhibition will be held at the War memorial Hall from may 5 to 7 at 10.30am to 5.30pm. Entrance is free and paintings are always realistically priced but please note there are no credit card facilities. Refreshments will be available.

A TABLE TOP SALE will be held on may 5 at the old Chapel Centre from 10am to 1pm to raise funds on behalf of Animal Welfare. Refreshments available. All are welcome.

PRUE LEITH will celebrate the publication of her autobiography, Relish – My Life on a Plate on may 16 at Deans Place Hotel from 6.30pm for 7pm. Tickets are only available in advance from the Much Ado Books shop or telephone 01323 871222. Individual tickets cost £22 (including a copy of Relish) or couples can purchase a ticket for two at £35 which includes one copy of the book. Also included will be a glass of wine and light nibbles. Prue Leith can be seen as a judge in great British Menu on television and is well known for her writing in national newspapers and for her cookery books.

A JUBILEE BAZAAR to be run by the WI will be held on may 12 from 2pm to 4.30pm in the War Memorial Hall. there will be cake and produce, plant and book stalls, a raffle and a chocolate tombola plus, of course, tea and biscuits. there will be slices of cake to be bought for immediate consumption.

HALL AGM: as you are probably aware, the village hall is one of the hubs of village life. at the AGM each year there is a chance to catch up with the committee’s hard work during the past year and the plans for the future, as they present their report and accounts. the election of officers for the coming year takes place. the hall is open for refreshments from 7am with the business starting at 7.30pm tonight, Friday. My apologies for omitting the date last week. Please come along and show your support, and if you have any flashes of inspiration for the future programme, please express them.

CHURCH SERVICES: Sunday, St John’s Bodle Street, 9.30am Morning Worship with Holy Communion. St Mary’s Warbleton, 8am Holy Communion, 11am Family Service.

WI: this month’s meeting is on Tuesday at 2.30pm in the village hall. It is a business meeting when the proposed WI resolution for the national meeting will be discussed.

HERITAGE CENTRE: the Mayor will be opening Hailsham Museum for the season today, Friday, at 10am. It will be open again tomorrow, Saturday, and every Friday and Saturday from 10am to 12.30pm until the end of September. the museum is at Blackmans Yard, Market Street (behind the kebab shop). On view are items and artefacts of the locality going back in time, of domestic, rural and agricultural interest and much more, along with photos of Hailsham’s past. this year, being the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee, a small section has been given to items that are commemorative to her Majesty’s coronation. Admission is free.

BOWLING OPEN DAY: Hailsham Bowling Club is holding an Open Day tomorrow, Saturday, at the bowling green in Vicarage Field. the session will be from 10am to 1pm. Equipment will be provided. Please wear flat-soled shoes or trainers. If you are new to bowls or have bowled in the past and would like to start again then this could be for you. If you have just retired and are looking for something to do, or have just retired from a more energetic sport, again this could be for you. for more details contact Kathy on 01323 840595, or Tom on 01323 849810. Ample free parking.

CLAIRVOYANT EVENING: there has been a change of programme for tomorrow, Saturday, evening. the medium will now be Sheila Appleton instead of psychic artist, Bill Forrester. It will be at the Corinthian Church at 7.30pm. Entry £5 at the door.

ST MARY’S: this is the fifth Sunday of Easter. Holy Communion is at 8am. Morning Service with crèche and children’s groups is at 10.30am, Bible by the Beach guest speaker Rev Alec Motyer. there is no evening service. at 7.30pm there is an evening celebration at the Congress Theatre, Eastbourne with speaker Rico Tice.

CORINTHIAN CHURCH: On Sunday the Corinthian Church and Healing Association Service is from 11am to noon with Paul Broadway at Primrose Hall and is followed by refreshments.

KNIT’INN NIGHTS: If you would like to learn to knit, here is a three-point plan to get you started. 1, Buy a ball or two of yarn, not too thin, that is just the right colour and feel; 2, think of something small (gauntlets, baby clothes, cushions) you would like to make; 3, join a group, like the one at the King’s Head where someone will be able to show you how to do it and support you as you learn and gain the confidence to do it on your own. Knit’Inn Nights are twice a month. the next one will be on Tuesday at 7.30pm. for more information, phone Su (07951 631749) or the King’s Head (01323 440447).

LIBRARY: Hailsham library has collaborated with Hailsham Photographic Society to commemorate the centenary of the death of local photographer Edwin Isaac Baker 1837-1912. many of his images have been replicated creating an up to date record of Hailsham in 2011/12. Rebuilt in the 1980s Piper’s Newsagents stands on the site of his Photographic Studio. the prints can be viewed as a fascinating exhibition in the library from Monday April 30 until Saturday June 2 when the Diamond Jubilee Rose Garden, to the front of the Library, will be officially opened by the Lord Lieutenant of Sussex.

PAVILION SOCIETY: Hailsham old Pavilion Society volunteers took charge of the Bates Farm Bluebell Walk at Arlington raising a fantastic £1,000 over two days providing lunches, soups, teas and coffees for visitors. they also manned the gate and all worked hard to ensure everything ran smoothly. Visitors enjoyed a lovely day. the bluebells were out and made a lovely contrast with the white anemones. the weather was overcast with sunny spells, but most importantly it didn’t rain. there was a regular stream of visitors coming through the gate to enjoy the farm trails and animals. Apart from the lovely bluebells and walks, the highlight for many of the visitors was the fantastic array of cakes on offers all made by the society’s army of volunteers. HOPS would like to thank all its volunteers for their kind donations of cakes and also Lynne Chapman and Tesco for its kind donation of food for the catering. thanks also to John McCutchan and Philippa Vine for allowing HOPS to run the walk for the two days which raised over £1,000 for the old Pavilion. this will go towards the essential redecoration of the outside of the building. the bluebell walk at Arlington is open until may 13 and makes a lovely day out. It is well signposted and easy to find. If you require further information you can visit their website at bluebellwalk.co.uk or ring 01323 485151.

U3A: the University of the Third Age Theatre Group has been to see Sister Act, the Russian Ice Stars performing Cinderella and Dreamboats and Petticoats. the family history group has enjoyed a session entitled who do you think they were? there is an Italian group which meets on alternate Wednesdays and a discussion group whose subject recently was public transport attended by Barry Marlow from the town council. He shared much information about the community bus and the debate covered buses, trains, planes and ferries. Olympics – are they good for the UK was the next subject and at the end of may will be the Internet, pros and cons. If you would like to join any of the many groups held or U3A generally, please contact Janet (chair) in the first instance on (01825) 873646, email or visit their website at hailshamu3a.co.uk

ORGAN CLUB Keyboard maestro Ben Scott Hyde will be weaving his musical magic at the Hailsham Organ Club meeting at the Hailsham Pavilion on Wednesday at 7.30pm. this very animated player always packs in huge crowds and you are welcome to go along too as a guest, just turn up and pay on the door. more details from Charles Clegg on (01323) 762411.

HISTORICAL and Natural History Society meet on Wednesday for Following the Luther Trail, an illustrated talk describing a journey through the countryside, villages and towns of Eastern Germany, following the trail of Martin Luther, whose reformation set 15th century Europe ablaze. this will take place at the Methodist church hall. Please note, the meeting will be starting at the earlier time of 7.30pm. All are welcome, visitors £2. Annual membership £10. the April meeting was a change to the published programme, but what an interesting evening it was. James Gardner gave an account on the Balcombe Tunnel murder of 1881 and, if that was not chilling enough, went into depth about the incident. an Isaac Gold was attacked on the London to Brighton train and his body was found alongside the track in Balcombe Tunnel. this made national news as well as appearing in the Sussex Express. James talked members through the events, about catching the suspect, a journalist, Percy Lefroy Mapleton, about the inquest and his eventual hanging in front of a large crowd at Lewes Prison.

Hellingly & Horsebridge

SUNDAY SERVICES: Hellingly: Holy Communion at 8am and again at 10.45am. Evensong is at 6.30pm. Upper Dicker, Holy Communion at 9.15am.

PHOTOGRAPHIC SOCIETY: the results of the Projected Image Finals judged by Trevor Gellard FRPS for the Swallow Cup are as follows: 1, Winter Walk by Steve Nixon; 2, great British Cuppa by Steve Nixon; 3, Two Brothers by Martin Rumary. for the Sussex Shield Intermediate results were: 1, Breakfast by Peggy McKenzie; 2, Ritual by Peggy McKenzie; 3, View From the Platform by Wendy Chrismas LRPS. the Arthur Hillman Cup Advanced places were: 1, On the Footplate by Alan Spencer; 2, Spotted Hyena Pup (Crocula crocula) by Terry McGhie LRPS; 3, Pupils by Roy Morris LRPS. Highly Commended Certificates were awarded to Terry McGhie for Southern Ground Hornbill Family, Waterbuck Rutting, and Snarl (Panthera Leo) and also Mike Sales LRPS for Harp Player. there was a good turnout for the first of the society’s summer outings which took place at Diamond Farm. Hosts Chrissy and Robin Neale introduced the farm animals group by group. Cows with calves, chickens, horses, ducks, guinea fowl, pigs and sheep with lambs posed dutifully for the cameras. Chrissy walked across a field to a hole in the hedge and was followed by two cows trotting behind, called sheep and walked back to the crowd. the sheep, with lambs in tow, charged across the field after her in anticipation. Children were given the opportunity to bottle feed a few of the lambs which slurped the mixture down at record speed and, while Chrissy was talking about the calves, one of the cows snuck up beside her, rolled out its slobbery long tongue, and licked her cheek before she knew what was happening. after touring the farmyard members were taken across a variety of fields, wooded glades covered with bluebells and primroses and back to the farmhouse for a delicious cream tea. One of the Labradors needed to be housed elsewhere for the event as he had eaten a whole batch of freshly baked scones while her back was turned and could no longer be trusted. Chrissy requested that the £117 raised during the event should be donated to Demelza.

RESIDENTS ASSOCIATION: the North Hailsham and Hellingly Residents Association are meeting this evening, Friday, at Union Corner Hall from 8pm to 9.30pm. more information on (01323) 449700 or email .

THE PARISH COUNCIL next meets on Wednesday commencing at 7.30pm in the village hall. Meetings are occasionally subject to change. Confirmation from the clerk on 01323 484210 and hellingly-pc.org.uk

Herstmonceux & Wartling

SQUEEZE: at the centre of the breakfast table at the April Squeeze stood a Hungarian-style Easter tree. the body was a bunch of reeds in an earthenware jug. From the reeds hung decorated hen’s eggs, and among them a cockerel and a hen in a nest. Easter was only a week away and the handicrafts largely centred around the art of well-dressing with flowers. Roses set into a cross-shaped trough became part of the Easter decoration at the Free Church on the following Sunday. Since it was Palm Sunday there were crosses of palm leaf to make and cards for the family, and badges of a crown with jewels and the words King of kings, on a short cord for hanging from a buttonhole. the next Squeeze Breakfast Club falls on Sunday from 10am until noon, in the village hall. the theme will be “Is there more to life than food, drink and clothing?” a simple breakfast of cereals, fresh fruit, pastries, and various drinks is provided. All ages are welcome, and there is no charge.

THE MG CAR CLUB, who meet on a monthly basis at Herstmonceux Castle, will be holding a summer picnic at the Observatory Science Centre on Sunday July 22. they are looking for any market traders who would like to go along with their stalls on the day. unfortunately they are unable to accept any kind of refreshment stalls. they already have a very varied selection including plants, tombola and auto jumble, a walking stick maker, upholsterer, classic car portraits and a lady selling unique handbags. a special treat will be that the new MG6 will be on display courtesy of an MG car dealership from Brighton and, they will be handing out goody bags. If you wish to see more about this event visit their website soutdownsmg.org.uk. If you would like to enquire about taking a stall on the day please contact Alan Carter at a.

THE HEALTH CENTRE ran a quiz night recently and are pleased to report that they raise £650 towards equipment for the new surgery. All at the surgery were overwhelmed at the support and would like to pass on their thanks to all who helped run this event and to all those who went along. their next event will be an auction in the village hall on Saturday June 16. they already have a number of items and services to auction, but would be grateful of more. unfortunately they are not able to auction any electrical goods nor are they really looking for any unwanted Christmas gifts. however, if you have any good quality goods that you no longer need, or perhaps you would be happy to give a couple of hours of your time, or any sort of original service, they would be very interested. Please contact Ann or Sharon at the surgery on 833935 if you can help.

FOOTBALL: the second team escaped relegation when they played Parkfield last week by winning 2-1. Two early goals from Ash Hall and Jon Brettany gave Herstmonceux the 2-0 lead in the first 15 minutes. however, a goal from Steven Brooks (Parkfield) dragged the score back to 2-1. the three points ensure a seventh place finish, sending Robertsbridge down to the bottom division. next week the first team travel to Eastbourne Sports Park to play against Hurst in the cup semi-final, kick off at 2.30pm.

COMPETITION: an Easter colouring competition was held recently at Lime Cross Nurseries which local artist, Caroline Green, judged over the Easter weekend. the age 4 years and under group results were: 1, Matilda Clowes; 2, Jack Sawyer; 3, David Nock. In the 5 to 8 years group the winners were: 1, Bella Henderson; 2, Samantha Goulder; 3, Hannah Heap. In the 9 to 12 years group: 1, Taylor Mepham; 2, Red Fielder-vanKleef; 3, Katie Titmuss. All winners were presented with a Suttons Fun to Grow Kit and a voucher with all entrants being presented with a consolation prize for their efforts.

OPEN GARDEN: On Saturday, may 19, Carters Corner Farm will be open to the public between 11am and 3pm in aid of Herstmonceux Guides. at the farm there is a beautiful woodland walk. they will also be running a variety of stalls including local craft, refreshments and a raffle. It is a beautiful garden and well worth the visit.

CHURCH SERVICES: On Sunday Holy Communion along with Evensong will be held at Wartling church at 8am and 6pm respectively with the Family Service being g held at Herstmonceux church at 11am.

PLANT SALE: Tomorrow, Saturday, in the village hall. Plants, books about gardening, garden sundries, cuttings etc from 10am. All Saints Church is hosting the event and profits will go to the church fund.

THE LIBRARY will visit the following areas this week. Today, Friday: Wannock village hall 9am to 9.30am; Ades Field, Church Bailey, Westham 10am to 10.40am; Wilmington 4.20pm to 4.40pm. Tuesday: Dene’s Road Alfriston 9.30am to 10.10am; opposite Rose Cottage Alciston 10.40am to 11am; Selmeston village hall 11.05am to 11.30am; Village Hall Arlington 11.40am to 12.05pm; Laughton village school 3.05pm to 3.45pm. Wednesday: Bodle Street Green 10.30am to 10.55am; Osborne Park, Rushlake Green 11.10am to 11.35am; Punnetts Town School 11.45am to 12.25pm. Thursday: Ashburnham 9.50am to 10.10am.

PLANT SALE: the horticultural society held their annual Plant Sale on April 28 and the committee are delighted that they took over £400. they would like to thank all of you who donated plants, worked behind the stall and of course, the buyers. they hope all your purchases are well watered in.

WINE TASTING: Today, Friday, at the Memorial Hall, 7.30pm. Tickets can be purchased at the Ninfield Stores for £10.50 each. Sample eight different wines and some cheeses.

BLUEBELL WALK: the village society are holding a Bluebell Walk tomorrow, Saturday, 10am to noon, meeting at the Reading Room. this is a free conducted tour of Church Wood to see this beautiful little wood, look at the recent work of the society volunteers and hopefully to see the bluebells and other signs of summer. this invitation is open to all. Refreshments will also be available.

PCSO, Daryl Holter will be holding a meet and greet at Ninfield Stores on Sunday from 9am. He will also be at Ninfield Post Office on June 11 from 9am. These are a great chance for you to meet Daryl and let him know of any policing concerns that you may have.

THE PRAM RACE will be held on the Rec on Monday. Registration for races will begin at 11.30am, with races beginning at midday. race categories are juniors (11yrs and under); seniors (12 to 18yr); adults; fun; veteran. this is sure to be a fun afternoon.

HOOE OPEN GROUP will be meeting will be on Friday may 11 when Wiltshire Farm Foods will give a presentation of the home delivery service, with a chance to sample their range of products. If you are interested in joining a very friendly ladies club, where there is always a welcome when you step inside. Come along to Hooe Village Hall on the second Friday of any month at 2.30pm (Except August) and meet the members and enjoy their company, with an interesting talk followed by chat and a cup of tea. more information from Edna Wallis on 01424 842591.

THE FLOWER GROUP are meeting on may 14 at Hilliers Garden Centre at Stone Cross. All members and friends will be welcome to join them for a talk on Plant Material at 6.30pm at the centre. Coffee and cake available and the nursery will stay open until 8.15pm if anyone would like to shop. Further information from Susan Cambell .

CARNIVAL: the theme of this year’s carnival, July 14, is the Olympics. Due to Olympic commitments, the police will be unable to provide any support for the road closure. Therefore, we need at least 15 marshalls to help with the procession. We also would ideally like a vehicle with flashing lights at the front and rear of the procession. Marshalls will be needed between 10.30am and 1.30pm. If you can help please contact Lorna 893644. to start the event in the Arena there will be an official Opening Ceremony with the Olympic Flame lighting a beacon on the rec. 100 people are needed to perform an easy routine with flags, ribbons, hoops etc. three rehearsals will be required, Sami is organising it so call, email (893699 or email ).

CHURCH SERVICES: Sunday, Combined Service at St Oswald’s 10.30am. No evening service. Wednesday at St Mary’s, 10am Holy Communion. Ninfield Methodist Church, 2.30pm Holy Communion with Revd Ian Wales.

DO YOU NEED a venue for a special celebration? Trinity Church Hall is available for hire. Please contact Ruth on 07901971527 or email

THE COFFEE MORNING tomorrow, Saturday, at Polegate Community Centre is hosted by the Social Section. All welcome in the lounge from 10am.

POLEGATE STROLLERS walk on may 8, Toby Carvery, for lunch. Meet at Jubilee Tree, High Street at 10am. We will walk there and back via the Cuckoo Trail; pick ups at old Polegate Station and St Mary’s Road Lynholm Road. Contact Jayne on 487543 to book your meal in advance.

TICKETS now on sale at Archer and Partners 483348 for the production of Stepping out, which takes place from Wednesday may 9 to Sunday may 12. Tickets are £7.50 for adults and £5.50 for children and students. Online tickets may be obtained from t@polegatgedrama. Visit polegatedramagroup.co.uk

CHURCHES TOGETHER celebrated St George’s day on Monday April 23, with hymns, and readings from the combined churches of Apostolic Church Willingdon, St Andrews Jevington, St George’s Polegate, St John’s Polegate, St Mary’s Willingdon, St Wilfrid’s Willingdon, and Trinity Willingdon. Not only did we celebrated William Shakespeare’s birthday, the Queens 86th birthday but also the origins of the story of St George. St George was a martyr, not the mythical figure of folklore. He was a real man born in Cappadocia in about 275AD, when it was a dangerous time to be a Christian. his father was also martyred during one of the many persecutions of Christians. Young George travelled with his widowed mother to her homeland in Palestine where George became a soldier in the Roman army. He was well educated and distinguished himself as a soldier. In his early twenties he was promoted to Tribune, a rank comparable with that of a modern colonel. When he was nearly 25 years old, Emperor Diocletian chose George as personal bodyguard. George could not accept the appointment, as he knew that the Emperor worshipped pagan gods and that his guards made public adoration of them. this went against George’s Christian beliefs. In a rage, Diocletian gave orders for merciless tortures to be carried out on George, who was beheaded in 303AD. Nine years later Emperor Constantine, a Christian, ordered a great church to be built at Lydda, Palestine, over the tomb of George. the story of St George arrived in England with the invaders from the Angles, Danes and Norsemen. the story of the Princess and the Dragon were added for a deeper spiritual understanding. In the Middle Ages, Christian kings rode to the Crusades. One was Richard the Lion Heart and his army. During the many battles King Richard took the Red Cross on a white background, the arms of St George as the official emblem for his soldier’s shields, helmets, tabards and battlefield banners. after the safe return of the King many towns incorporated the George cross in their coat of arms. to the English St George, born of a Turkish father and Palestinian mother, is a true English Knight. During Medieval times few ordinary people could read, so everything was shown by symbols. the slaying of the monster dragon by St George is seen as representing the Christian defeat over the devil. an excellent production of St George slaying the dragon was performed by the children at St George’s church. In 1348 when King Edward III was on the throne, he was entertaining the Lady Joan, the fair Maid of Kent, when her garter snapped. his knights sniggered and the king was so embarrassed that he lifted the blue garter on his sword and told his court off for disrespect. after the Plague of the Black Death King Edward III named 24 knights and presented each with a blue garter decorated with a blue rosette. at the centre of the rosette was a miniature white shield bearing a red cross. the Order of the Garter of St George was founded. the date was April 23, 1348, which was declared St George’s Day. Congratulations on a memorable St George’s day service.

RAMBLING CLUB: may 10, Chiddingly and Gun Hill, 4.5 miles Wealdway and Vanguard Way, approx eight stiles with Howard and Hilary; or Herstmonceux, Boreham Street Circular, nearly 10 miles, mostly flat take picnic with John R. Meet at Wannock Road Recreation Ground at 9.30am.

PCASO: the April meeting began with a news update including a report from the AGM of the PCaSO Prostate Cancer Network. (The Eastbourne Support Group is part of the PCaSO East branch). Two members attended the AGM in the Vicar’s Hall, Chichester. Patron the Very Reverend Nicholas Frayling, Dean of Chichester Cathedral, was the guest speaker and gave a personal and amusing account. the main business then proceeded with the election of the honorary officers and approval of the accounts. the chairman of the PCaSO East Branch, Roger Bacon, was appointed chair of the main PCaSO charity. Newly elected PCaSO East secretary David Hurst also agreed to become secretary for the PCaSO Prostate Cancer Network. Peter Rimington, consultant urologist was guest speaker at the Eastbourne meeting in April. He spoke about the challenges of laparoscopic surgery and ensuring what is best for the patient. using images from real live procedures he explained some of the techniques. mr Rimington answered questions from the audience which included a number of new members to the group. the next meeting is on Thursday at 7pm in the Post Graduate Centre, Eastbourne District General Hospital. the speaker Dr G Osborne, Academic Clinical Fellow in Oncology, will discuss side effects of treatments for prostate cancer. All are welcome. Please contact Graham Hatfield on 01323 749258 / 641513 or e-mail if you require further details.

Warbleton & Rushlake Green

CHURCH SERVICES: Sunday, St Mary’s Warbleton, 8am Holy Communion, 11am Family Service. We held our APCM last Tuesday. after serving his six year term, mark Smith stood down as a church warden. Jennifer Gill was elected in his place along with David Cleverley. the following were elected to the PCC: Jonathan Austin, Helen Bowern, Gill Brentford, Meryl Clark, Barbara Cooke, Mick and Wendy Greaves, Andrew Russell, Joanna Smith and Caroline Thompson. By virtue of their office Marc Lloyd (rector), Jeremy Cooke (lay reader) and Deanery Synod reps Vivian Bowern, Jennifer Gill and mark Smith join them on the PCC. the new PCC were commissioned at last Sunday’s service. they meet on Monday may 14. We were delighted to welcome the family of Hugo Shipley, as he was baptised during the service last week. We need some more bell ringers. Training is available. Please contact David Cleverley if you are interested.

St John’s Bodle Street, 9.30am Morning Worship with Holy Communion. Heathfield Chapel, 11am Morning worship and communion, and 6.30pm evening service. the speaker at both services is Peter Trainer.

THE CHALLENGE is to make your go-kart and get it entered into the Church Hill Challenge, ready for the event on Monday June 4, part of our local celebrations of the Queens Diamond Jubilee. for details, or if you are able to help with marshalling, please see Gary and Nickki at the Black Duck.

VILLAGE PLAYERS: a reminder that tickets for Lord Arthur Savile’s Crime (May 9 to 12) are available from Anita Gunn on 01435 873226. Tickets are £17.50 to include a three course meal. the comedy is by Constance Cox based on a short story by Oscar Wilde.

Wannock & Jevington

ANJI, who runs the hairdressing salon in Church Street has been to visit the village in Poland where her father once lived. It is called Wola Rebkowska and is in the district of Garwolin. after the second World War, Edward Mianowski came to Britain, married, had a family and never went back to Garwolin. He never spoke about his past and died eight years ago aged 78. with their father’s old passport, a few legal documents and a photo of their grandparents, Anji and Christine decided that now was the time to make the journey to Poland and so they booked to stay in a hotel in Warsaw over the Easter holidays. they spoke no Polish and asked if they could hire a driver and interpreter to take them to Garwolin. a driver from the hotel was provided for them and an interpreter who was the bell boy at the hotel and knew the area well. the journey took them one and a half hours. they eventually located the little village of Wola Rebkowska. Enquiries were made among the local people and it wasn’t long before one of the elderly residents recognised Anji’s grandparents from the photo they were carrying as well as the passport photo of her father. they were directed to the family home and farmland. Anji and Christine had only expected to see where their father had once lived but were amazed to be greeted by an elderly aunt, the sister of their father. there was great excitement as she contacted the rest of the family, all living a short distance away. Anji and Christine eventually returned to their hotel in Warsaw later that day, but over the next three days one or other of their newly found family would drive to the hotel and take them back to Wola Rebkowska in order to meet yet more relatives, another aunt, an uncle, cousins, nieces and nephews, about 30 in all, and one night Anji and Christine actually stayed on the family farm. the Polish press heard of this amazing story and Anji and Christine were interviewed through an interpreter for live TV as well as for the local newspaper. they were told that over the years many had come to Warsaw trying to trace what had happened to their relatives, without success. But in less than a week Anji and Christine had found relatives that they didn’t even know that they had.

THE WHEATSHEAF: Tomorrow, Saturday, jazz and blues singer Penny Paige will be entertaining the customers from 8.30pm. On Tuesday the Wheatsheaf quiz will be starting at 8.30pm. On Wednesday the jam night with open mic starts at 8pm and on Thursday the Gardens Growers Group will be meeting from 6.30pm when guest speaker Mike Thompson will be talking about how to get the best from your tomatoes. the group will also be discussing forthcoming events including the plant swap and sale of plants, garden tools, decorated pots etc. this is planned to take place in the Stables opposite the Wheatsheaf from 11am on Saturday may 19. any profits will be donated to St Wilfrid’s Hospice.

AGM: Willingdon Residents Association AGM at 7.30pm on Wednesday at Trinity Church Hall. Rosalind Hodge will be giving an illustrated talk on Willingdon.

THE 3 MMMs (Miss mrs and Ms) will be meeting at 8pm in St Mary’s Church Hall when Dennis Grice will be demonstrating hanging baskets.

WILLINGDON WI will be meeting at 2.15pm on Thursday at the Memorial Hall. there will be a discussion and voting on the Resolutions and songs by Melody Magpies.

JEVINGTON and Filching WI will be meeting at 2pm on Thursday in Trinity Church Hall. the speaker is Heidi Rogers and her topic is Hot Beads. the competition is a Folded Serviette.

RED LION: From 7pm to 9pm on Thursday, Alan Grindle will be cooking one of his special recipes as part of the monthly Red Lion on Tour. this month’s recipe is from Cambodia. It is advisable to book 01323 502062.

CHURCH CONCERT: Michael Stumbles, organist at St Mary’s Church is organising one of his very popular concerts at the church at 7.30pm on Monday may 14. there certainly are some very talented vocalists and instrumentalists in the area and it looks as though many of them will be taking part in this concert, so please don’t miss it. Admission is free and there will be a retiring collection supporting Children with Cancer.

TOWER MILL: a selection of 16 new homes is to be built by Wealden District Council on the Tower mill site by 2014. These homes are to be rented to Willingdon residents or people with a strong connection to the local area.

COMMUNITY EVENTS: Trinity Church Arts and Crafts Exhibition is from 2pm to 5pm on Saturday may 26. Willingdon Primary School’s Diamond Jubilee celebrations are on Friday June 1. Trinity Church Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Afternoon Tea is from 2pm to 5pm on Saturday June 2, by ticket only. Willingdon and Jevington Parish Council’s Music in the Park incorporating the Big Lunch for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee is from 11am to 4.30pm on Sunday June 3 in Huggetts Lane Recreation Ground. Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Beacon on the Downs and Last Night of the Proms followed by fireworks is at Willingdon Community School on Monday June 4.the Glen Chorale will be performing their summer concert at Wannock Hall on Monday June 11 and Wednesday June 13 at 2.30pm. St Andrew’s Church Jevington will be having their Flower Festival on June 22, June 23 and June 24. St Wilfrid’s Church will be celebrating their 50th anniversary on Saturday June 23. the Rude Mechanical Theatre Production of who saw Marjory Daw’is on Wednesday July 4 at Filching Manor. St Mary’s Summer fair is on Saturday July 21. there will be more detailed information to come.

Parish Pump Hailsham – May 4, 2012

Parish Pump Hailsham – May 4, 2012 is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

It’s your boyfriend’ birthday and you want to make it special. Something he’ll never forget (at least not for a long time). Picking a man’s brain is easy actually, once you know what to give him. But in order to do this, let’s first go through the things you shouldn’t give him.

Don’t give him anything that is about your relationship. It’s not your anniversary; it’s his birthday so give your boyfriend birthday gifts that will make HIM feel good. No mushy things please. This isn’t the right time for relationship cheesiness.

Don’t get your boyfriend birthday gifts he can get from anyone. make him feel that you really know him and care about him by giving him something that he really likes or he feels strongly about. it may sound stupid to you but hey, it’s his birthday not yours.

Don’t give him something he already has. Practical advice. would you want to receive something like this? I guess not. Check his stuff or ask him subtly or make his friends ask him for you if you think you can’t do it without giving yourself away.

Now, let’s move on to the things he WILL like.

Gadgets are definitely on top of the list. Men’s brains are wired to like things that can be tinkered. although this may sound a bit pricey, you don’t have to get him the latest iMac. let your budget do the talking but make sure it’s something he’ll be able to use and enjoy.

Give your boyfriend birthday gifts he can enjoy with you. Just a word of caution, focus on him, not on you. You might want to see that chick flick and you decided to get movie tickets for the two of you on his birthday, major no-no. Think of what he likes, if he’s a sports guy, get him tickets to a sporting event. If he likes video games, get him the latest one he’s been dying to try. the point here: It’s the thought that counts.

Give him something unique. Unique as in something special he doesn’t know about what he is passionate about. eBay and Amazon can help you out on picking out unique boyfriend birthday gifts. try giving him something you know he’ll enjoy.

Whatever you give him, just remember that this day is about him. so make the most of it and you’ll surely give your boyfriend a happy birthday.

Gift Ideas For Your Boyfriend

Gift Ideas For Your Boyfriend is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

Ask any mom what the best present they ever received from their child was and they’ll probably show you a little handmade card of trinket that the child made for them sometime around the third grade. no matter what she might have been given over the years and how expensive the gifts were, the simple little gift that her child made with his own hands is still the most special.

Just because you’re older now doesn’t mean that it’s too late to give mom a gift that she will remember like when you were a child. In fact, you’re in a better position to really give her something special. the fact that she probably isn’t expecting something so personalized will make the gift that much better. An added benefit is that you can save money that might be tight.

There are several options for handmade mother’s Day gifts. they can range from simple things such as a personalized gift basket with items that are particularly enjoyed by your mom to elaborate crafts that took you weeks or months to finish. Here are a few practical ideas to get you thinking.

A gift that is always sure to please a mom is a family photograph. How many times have you heard your mom complain that she doesn’t have a recent photo of you or her grandchildren? this is simple, personalized and fairly cheap. If you want to take it a step further, why not add a handmade frame to the picture? Frames are not hard to make and can be designed using a variety of materials. Check online for some ideas. Put a little imagination into it and try to personalize the frame with a motif that will fit your mom’s lifestyle or decor.

A homemade card is another great option. Just like when you were a kid, this is sure to be a hit. Now that you’re older, you can take it a step further and add something even more special. How about adding a personalized photo to the card? another possibility is a card that contains a personalized voice message. the more personal the message the better the card will be.

If you are married and have children, don’t forget that it’s your wife’s day too. take the time to help your children design a special gift for their mom at the same time you make one for yours. What a great family bonding opportunity

Affordable Handmade Gifts on Mother’s Day

Affordable Handmade Gifts on Mother’s Day is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

By Jessica Garringer, Contributing Writer Updated 8:10 PM Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Looking for a unique and personalized gift for your mother? Why not give her flowers in a handmade flower pot?

This flower pot is easy to create and will definitely make your mom smile Sunday — Mother’s Day — when she sees all of the childhood photos.

Plus, for just $9.56, you are making something that won’t hurt your budget.

You will need

To buy:

Flower pot and base — $4.28 at Flower Factory

Flowers — $3.99 at Knollwood Garden Center

White Acrylic Paint — $1.29 at Michael’s Arts and Crafts

Items I already had:

Scissors or an X-acto Knife

Black and white photos

Directions

1. Remove all tags and labels from your flower pot.

2. Paint two or three coats of white paint onto your flower pot, letting each coat dry before applying the next.

3. Print out childhood photos you want to use. if you are printing them from your computer, then make sure your printer is a laser jet. if it is an inkjet printer, then the images will smear. if you do not have a laser-jet printer, then you can have your photos printed at Kinkos or just take them to a photo kiosk at your local grocery or pharmacy and have them printed there. this will cost about 10 cents per image, depending on the size.

4. Once your photos are all trimmed and ready, use the Mod Podge and glue the images to the sides of the flower pot. Leave the top rim empty.

5. Once your photos are secure, add Mod Podge to the tops of each photo. make sure to get all edges of each photo so they won’t peel off later on.

6. Let the Mod Podge dry completely and then place a second coat over the entire pot, both inside and out.

7. Since the bottom dish will come in contact with moisture, put at least two or three coats of Mod Podge on the dish.

8. Once everything is completely dry, tie a ribbon around the top rim of your pot.

9. Add your mother’s favorite flowers to the inside and you are left with a personalized gift that will make any mom smile.

Jessica Garringer is a bargain hunter and a couponer who loves to save money. you can reach her at?SaverSavvySavings@gmail.com. ?Get more money-saving tips, ideas?and projects at SaverSavvy.?com or find more DIY projects at Pinterest.com/SaverSavvy.

How to create flower pot for Mother’s Day

How to create flower pot for Mother’s Day is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

Why are some companies in the most competitive industries so incredibly innovative and how do they consistently bring new creative concepts in commercial applications? Not long, ago Wal-Mart began teaming up with some of the largest retailers so they could sell gift cars at their check-out stands. these would be bought by Wal-Mart Shoppers as gifts.

The gift card strategy is one that works extremely well in that companies realize that 20% of the gift card value is never actually used. This means the retailer can make a deal with the company to sell the cards and retain a percentage of this known quantity. Sounds good doesn’t it?

Indeed, this makes for a nice concept, I do recall recently being in Wal-Mart and seeing the rack for “pre-paid” cards and it said coming soon; ‘Southwest Airlines $150 Prepaid Cards.”

It got me thinking that the future of airline travel for the consumer will need to re-adjust with reality of the flying public and the challenges of fuel commodities. Now then, if 20% never gets used and the airline splits that with Wal-Mart, they have advanced sales. Wal-Mart pays the airline 60-days after the cards are sold and keeps the cash flow. The airline can then either discount the gift cards to Wal-Mart or split the profits of what is not sold.

Meanwhile, the airline still has some monies left over from what will never be used, everyone wins and the more they sell the lower the airline ticket prices can be to offset higher fuel costs. there is only one problem I see with this scheme from what I can see and that is that the FTC has recently been petitioned by the Consumers Union to make a stipulation in the laws on gift card sales to prevent companies from going bankrupt and consumers holding worthless gift cards. And let’s face it, in the airlines we will see more bankruptcies this year, even if the price of fuel drops. Think on this.

What is the Accounting For Prepaid Gift Cards – Prepaid Cards, Airlines, Flying Public and the FTC

What is the Accounting For Prepaid Gift Cards – Prepaid Cards, Airlines, Flying Public and the FTC is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

A box arrived in the mail today.  I missed it altogether, because I expected nothing coming to me that way.  But a friend told me that the box was mine, so I walked to the table by the mailboxes and looked at the writing.

A care package, from sister J.!  I remembered her saying she was putting a box together, but that had slipped my mind.  I broke a ball-point right off its pen in an effort to open the box; then, I settled down and got some scissors from the table. at the top of the package, a universal remote.  J. had said I should try one, as I’m juggling four remotes altogether in my living room.  And then she bought one for me.  How sweet of her.

Under the remote, and bright yellow tissue paper, I found half the box full of beautiful print tops.  I have been a clothes junkie for most of my adult life, but have not been able to indulge for the last decade or so, due to cost.  J. is a registrar in a brand new high school outside of San Diego CA, and she shops regularly for nice clothes.  She chooses lovely blouses, and then brings them home; occasionally, she hangs them in the closet and forgets to wear them.  A year or so later, I receive a box full of new or almost new shirts and tops, and today is Christmas all over again.

And under the clothes, Jane sent eight or ten VHS tapes;

movies she and her family now own on DVD.  As I am the only member of the family who still uses VHS, as well as DVD, I welcome these tapes with movie-day anticipation.  Do you know what I mean by movie-day anticipation?  When I receive a movie, which I’ve seen before, but which I don’t own in my collection, I get this warm happy vision of a rainy day, and popcorn, and a set of movie-favorites to watch.  These are those kinds of movies.  I can’t wait!

So many, many thanks to my sister J., out in CA, for the lovely gifts.  I will add these blouses to those she has sent before, and maybe massacre a few more yards of older clothes to make room.  And I’ll know, when I dress up for work, that my sister J. helped me to do it.  Thanks so much, J.  I love it all!

The Care Package

The Care Package is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

Flowers, chocolates, an intimate dinner for two, a weekend getaway in Paris — these are only a few of the things you can give to the man or woman in your life to express your love and affection.

The problem is that so many people make the mistake of thinking that the price of a gift is the best determinant of whether it will be held in high regard by the recipient. while the price tag does undoubtedly contribute to some extent to a gift’s impact, it is not the most important factor when it comes to how well it will be received.

You can buy a perfume gift set that costs more than $500 for instance, but if your recipient is allergic to fragrance, then that gift won’t have the romantic impact you were aiming for, would it?

On the other hand, if you bought your wife or girlfriend a bouquet of roses that set you back by only $25 or so, but roses are her favorite flowers, then it is more than likely that she will view and appreciate the gift as a romantic gesture from you.

Another thing to keep in mind when looking for a gift for your beloved is that the most memorable presents are not necessarily material in nature. Surprising him with a trip to somewhere new where the fishing is great (if he is an avid fisherman, for example) or presenting her with tickets to a Broadway play she has been anticipating is also a very romantic gesture. Being there to share in an experience that your man or woman will find pleasure in can be a priceless present.

Some men and women are reluctant to give gifts because of budgetary constraints. they feel they cannot afford to give extravagant gifts to their partner. But, as stated above, gifts need not be expensive to be special.

According to relationship experts, the giving of gifts is an important form of communication in a relationship. Giving the right gift is a way of making your partner feel appreciated and loved. it is a way of saying You are in my thoughts and I love you. it strengthens the bond between giver and recipient, cementing the relationship even more. looking at it this way, you cannot afford to NOT give a gift if you want the bond between the two of you to stay steadfast and true.

How to Show Your Love Through the Giving of Gifts

How to Show Your Love Through the Giving of Gifts is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care

Searching for a unique birthday gift for your girlfriend this year? Why don’t you get one that will not only put a smile on her face but also get her to burst out laughing at the same time? A hilarious birthday gifts for her can actually be practical as well. Read on for some ideas that you can use to get her that funny birthday gift; something that will keep her smiling for days.

A box of her favorite chocolates or candies can come in hilarious forms if you know where to find them. Skip the usual-shaped chocolates and go for unconventional-looking chocolates. If she loves chocolates, she will be biting into that funny-shaped ones in no time after she’s done laughing. You can get a chocolate in a shape of a real heart, a figure, an animal and more. Pick the shapes that will tickle her funny bones.

Handbags come in wide choices of funny shapes and patterns as well. Engage her love for handbags with a bag that has eyeball-buttons, animal prints or one that is made out of candy wrappers or patched-up cloth materials. She may even call it a work of art, if you’re lucky. There are amusing-shaped bags that come in the form of a dog, frog, cat and more for you to choose.

Women love shoes and if your girlfriend is one of these women, she will appreciate your selection of funny shoe items for her birthday. There are shoe-shaped keychain, books, desk items, and even a door stop. Indulge your own creativity by getting a cheap pair of shoes and turn them into a pencil holder and other weird-looking desktop ornaments. Other birthday gifts for her include shoe-shaped rings, necklace and earrings to choose from if you run out of ideas.

Hilarious Birthday Gifts For Her

Hilarious Birthday Gifts For Her is a post from: LovingCareGifts.com: Gifts With Love & Care